We all know the pain of missing someone.
When your loved one is not with you, for whatever reason, it feels like there’s a void in your life you just can’t fill.
You are reminded of them every breath you take, and you feel like you just can’t live without them.
You might wonder where they are, what they are doing, and so on.
Sometimes, you miss someone so much that it hurts.
Physically, mentally, and emotionally.
I am sure a lot of you might have experienced this.
After all, we all lose loved ones throughout our lives one way or the other.
I guess it is just a natural part of life.
And no matter how much we hate it, we must accept it and do things to get ourselves out of the states of grief and misery.
That’s the only way we can make sure our lives keep going forward.
To that end, let’s take a look at some great things you can do when you’re missing someone a lot.
- 1) Talk It Out With Someone
- 2) Call Them And Spend Time Virtually
- 3) Address The Issue Instead of Suppressing It
- 4) Practice Mindfulness Regularly
- 5) Stay Busy With Something Or The Other
- 6) Share Their Memories With Someone
- 7) Get Closure
- 8) Don’t Forget To Take Care Of Yourself
- 9) Allow Yourself To Form New Connections
- 10) Get Professional Help
1) Talk It Out With Someone
When you miss someone, you are essentially filled with a lot of intense thoughts and emotions.
Deep within you, a storm takes place, and it keeps swirling inside you until you let it out.
This storm is the reason why you feel so terrible.
So, naturally, you should look for ways to achieve inner peace.
And one great way you can do that is to talk it out with a loved one.
You could get a hold of your best friend, a sibling, or your parents.
Even someone at work will do just fine if you happen to share a rapport with them.
Next, just tell them everything that’s going on in your life.
Let out your intense thoughts and emotions and be honest with your loved one.
Tell them whom you are missing and why.
Tell them that it is eating you up from the inside out.
The more you share, the better you will feel.
Who knows, they might even share their coping mechanism with you, and that might give you a way out!
2) Call Them And Spend Time Virtually
If you have moved to a different state or country, you might miss your family, spouse, or partner.
After all, everything feels new in the beginning, and this reminds you of the comfort and familiarity of your loved ones.
This is also the reason you start feeling more and more lonely.
Naturally, you start missing your loved ones so much that it starts to hurt.
You might even begin to question your decision to move away from them.
In this case, what you can do is, talk to them over the phone or get on a video call with them.
Of course, this doesn’t even come close to meeting them and being with them, but it’s the next best thing.
You can schedule weekly conference calls (audio or video) and just catch up!
That way, you won’t fear that your loved ones will slowly forget you as they get closer to other people.
And you will also get to share some beautiful moments with them!
3) Address The Issue Instead of Suppressing It
A lot of people tend to suppress any issues they might be facing.
They think that doing so will make the problem go away, or at least they will start feeling better eventually.
This is far from how things actually play out.
In reality, when you suppress something, it only gets bigger and bigger inside you.
The same is the case when you are missing someone.
If it is a breakup or a friendship that ended, it might feel awkward to address the issue.
So, you keep putting off talking to the other person and making things right.
And telling them that you miss them seems like a crazy idea.
But, you know what? That could be exactly what you need to do.
Just talk to the other person.
Tell them how you feel.
If it’s someone you just broke up with, tell them that they still mean a lot to you and that you miss them.
If it’s a friendship that ended, again, do the same.
Whether things ended amicably or badly, that doesn’t matter.
What matters is communicating how you’re feeling.
4) Practice Mindfulness Regularly
As I mentioned above, when you are missing someone, a lot goes on inside you.
So many complex thoughts and emotions surface, and you might not be able to make sense of it all.
Plus, there is that feeling of emptiness that makes you restless.
The end result?
It spills over to the other aspects of your life, and you can’t do anything well.
Of course, this can disturb your life.
It can create additional problems for you that might only make things worse.
So, to stop all of this, you could practice mindfulness regularly.
Yes, much like how monks do.
Mindfulness can help you distance yourself from the memories of your loved ones.
This doesn’t mean you are running away from them.
On the contrary, you are just focusing on what you should do in the present moment.
So, if your work needs your attention, you do that.
If someone else needs your attention, you give them what they need.
When you practice mindfulness regularly, you begin to feel more peaceful and at ease with yourself.
And this can make you miss your loved one less.
5) Stay Busy With Something Or The Other
You must have heard the old saying, “An empty mind is the devil’s workshop.”
If you remain idle, you are bound to be reminded of your loved one, over and over again.
I am not saying that missing someone is evil… I am just saying that when it gets so intense that you start feeling hurt, it might be time to take charge of the situation.
Sometimes, all you need to do is be so busy that you have absolutely no time to miss anyone!
This could be the perfect opportunity to start doing things you might have avoided for a long time.
You could dive into the world of books, listen to music, start binge-watching a tv show, start hanging out with your friends more often, practice yoga, meditate, paint, learn a new language, join a sports club, and more!
The point is, instead of wasting time hurting yourself by repeatedly thinking about someone, you can use that time to do something productive or fun.
You don’t have to waste away your life just because someone is not in your vicinity.
After all, they are a part of your life… not your life!
Sometimes, a loss is permanent.
And you have no option of getting your loved one back.
You just have to live with it forever.
In cases like these, the pain of missing them can be unbearable. It can feel like your whole life is crashing right in front of you.
And you just can’t see a way forward.
If you are in this boat, please know that time heals everything.
No matter how big the pain is, time makes everything okay eventually.
In the meantime, you can honor the memories of the one you have lost. Instead of getting hurt by their memories, you can start cherishing them.
In a way, doing so would be celebrating their life.
You can do this with someone you trust and love.
Find someone who is supportive and willing to go through this journey with you.
Then, just talk about all the happy times you had with the one you lost. It is okay to be vulnerable.
You are in a safe place.
Each time you do this, you will feel lighter and lighter. And eventually, the sadness will be replaced by appreciation for the time you spend with your loved one.
7) Get Closure
Closure is a really important thing for us humans.
Be it in a relationship, career, or any other aspect of life.
It marks the end of the old and the beginning of the new.
It removes one’s gaze from the past and redirects it to the future.
Closure is what sets people free and allows them to move on with their lives.
This is especially seen in relationships.
We have all seen how people keep suffering even after a breakup. In most cases, this happens because they don’t get closure.
They may still have a million questions in their minds.
They might wonder why the other person broke up with them, what their fault was, whether they did something wrong, whether they are worthy of love, and so on.
All these questions keep circulating inside their minds, and this makes them miss the other person much more.
If you find yourself in this situation, it’s just better to talk to the other person and get closure (whatever this may mean to you).
It might be a little hard at first, but the moment you get closure, you will feel a lot lighter. You will be able to accept the situation and start the process of healing.
8) Don’t Forget To Take Care Of Yourself
Whenever things go south in our lives, the one person we forget about is ourselves.
We become so immersed in our grief and sorrows that we forget we are human beings with necessities and needs.
And when we don’t pay attention to our needs, things start to get even worse.
So, no matter whom you are missing, please take care of yourself.
I know you will not want to but do it anyway.
Eat the food you want, get the sleep you need, get some exercise, reach out to other loved ones, dive into spiritual practices, or do anything else that ensures your well-being.
Don’t forget that the first and most important relationship you have is with yourself.
If that collapses, nothing else will matter.
So, start by taking care of yourself and then see how you can address the situation at hand.
9) Allow Yourself To Form New Connections
When you are missing someone, you are essentially feeling lonely.
As a human being, it is your inherent need to spend time with people you love and care about.
And when you are not able to do that with the person you want, you start missing them a lot.
The thing is, things don’t always go our way.
Loved ones can pass away, get separated, get estranged, and so on.
And that leaves you no option but to accept that they are no longer going to be a part of your life.
But that doesn’t mean you can’t form new connections whenever you feel ready.
The world is a big place and there are billions of humans on the planet.
Who knows whom you will meet? Your next best friend or lover might be out there waiting for you!
So, don’t limit yourself and waste time being stuck in the past.
Look to the future, and be more open.
Not only do you have other loved ones in your life, but you also have so many potential companions out there!
Sometimes, all your tries to feel better may be in vain.
Sometimes, your heart just doesn’t want to listen to you.
It feels what it feels.
And you feel like this will always be your life.
Of course, eventually, things get so out of hand that even living seems like an ordeal.
This is when you know that it is time to get professional help.
A trained counselor will understand what you are going through and use their years of experience to help you out exactly the way you need it.
The most important thing they will do for you is show you the way forward.
They will help you understand that it is possible for you to get out of your situation and start living again.
Sometimes, that’s all a person needs to start healing and moving on with their lives.